From Heart Through Mind

I am back !!

2009-05-15T04:42:00.000-07:00

Finally I managed to get back to blogging. Last few months were very hectic. Life is not at all easy after this recession has hit all of us so badly. I remember good old days, when people from software industry used to consider themselves invincible, we always thought that nothing can happen to us. Those flow of calls by placement agents gave us a false sense of job security. Now we are one of the most stressed lot. It's not that only software industry is hit in this recession, some of the other sectors are badly affected and in fact doing worse, but higher you go, the fall is worse. The obscene salary levels of s/w professionals has now become a bane. I have heard some stories of people joining at half of their earlier salaries. Some of my friends who lost their jobs in this turmoil are desperately looking for another opportunities, but the jobs have dried up.

I believe this is a correction that is going on and things will be much more stable in coming future. Market is already showing some signs of recovery. This big jolt was necessary for people like us to seriously think and plan about the future of self and family. This has at least changed my entire thought process and the casual approach is now replaced with caution.

"Can I live without it?"

I remember this phrase my father used very often to stress upon curbing the mindless spending. This approach is on one extreme, where you do things only necessary for the living, which is not practical in today's world. We can probably modify it a bit and now ask

"Can I sleep peacefully without it?"

Because I believe you lose sleep only over something absolutely necessary, or else you have sleeping disorders. Rest of the disappointments are only temporary. The downturn has taught me a lot and I hope and wish to continue to utilize my newly found wisdom.

A beautiful poem by Prasoon Joshi

2008-12-02T01:18:00.000-08:00

Prasoon Joshi has written a very nice poem after Mumbai terror attacks.

इस बार नहीं
इस बार जब वोह छोटी सी बच्ची मेरे पास अपनी खरोंच ले कर आएगी
मैं उसे फूक फूक कर नहीं बहलाऊँगा
पनपने दूँगा उसकी टीस को
इस बार नहीं

इस बार जब मैं चेहरों पर दर्द लिखा देखूँगा
नहीं गाऊँगा गीत पीड़ा भुला देने वाले
दर्द को रिसने दूँगा,उतरने दूँगा अन्दर गहरे
इस बार नहीं

इस बार मैं न मरहम लगाऊँगा
न ही उठाऊँगा रुई के फाहे
और न ही कहूँगा की तुम आंखें बंद करलो,गर्दन उधर कर लो मैं दावा लगता हूँ
देखने दूँगा सबको हम सबको खुले नंगे घाव
इस बार नहीं

इस बार जब उलझने देखूँगा,छटपटाहट देखूँगा
नहीं दौडूंगा उलझी डोर लपेटने
उलझने दूँगा जब तक उलझ सके
इस बार नहीं

इस बार कर्म का हवाला दे कर नहीं उठाऊँगा औजार
नहीं करूंगा फिर से एक नयी शुरुआत
नहीं बनूँगा मिसाल एक कर्मयोगी की
नहीं आने दूँगा ज़िन्दगी को आसानी से पटरी पर
उतरने दूँगा उसे कीचड में,टेढे मेढे रास्तों पे
नहीं सूखने दूँगा दीवारों पर लगा खून
हल्का नहीं पड़ने दूँगा उसका रंग
इस बार नहीं बनने दूँगा उसे इतना लाचार
की पान की पीक और खून का फर्क ही ख़त्म हो जाए
इस बार नहीं

इस बार घावों को देखना है
गौर से
थोड़ा लंबे वक्त तक
कुछ फैसले
और उसके बाद हौसले
कहीं तो शुरुआत करनी ही होगी
इस बार यही तय किया है

I hope

2008-12-01T21:06:00.000-08:00

Dust is settling....

People look tired now about talking and listening same things again and again. Some politicians are still keeping things interesting, whether it's Mukhtar Abbas Naqvi's lipstick & powder remark or Kerala CM Achhutananda insulting Major Unnikrishnan's father, politicians never get tired.

In media now many questions are being raised about the way whole operation was handled, the hand of Pakistan in these attacks, the advance intelligence etc. At the same time union government is now indulging in some face saving exercise, heads are rolling. Is all this going to help? Is anybody seriously thinking about the security of our nation? Any solid planning on how we can avoid such incidents in future? There are two sides of things, one side is common people, angry.... with politicians..... with overall system. I am sure they will accept things as they are after sometime and will be busy in their lives....till next terror strike happens. The other part is the people who can do something to improve the situation.... politicians & bureaucrats. This group is either inept in handling the situation or just doesn't care. They are just waiting for the common people to forget all this and life will be as usual.

What is the solution....

Common man cannot take things in his own hands, we have to depend on these politicians and bureaucrats, because the system can't be changed overnight. This entire system is a reflection of our society. The cleansing of society takes years, sometime few generations if we wait for it to change. Indians are extremely tolerant lot, we never ask questions. Even if we ask questions nobody cares to respond, nobody is accountable for anything. We need to develop a system where all these politicians are answerable to their actions. One major flaw in Indian democracy is no provision of recall. Once elected, government is safe from public for 5 years. When we have power to elect we must have power to reject also. The rejection also includes the rejection at the time of election. I came across article 49-O in the electoral reforms proposal by Election Commission, which talks about the "none of these" option in election. If "none of these" wins, then a re-election happens and none of the previous candidates are allowed to contest. But this proposal is lying at home ministry since 2004. Provisions like these will create fear among politicians and make them accountable. The fear of failure is more, when you know the consequences.

I am still hopeful, waiting for a happy ending.....

The Aftermath

2008-11-30T23:10:00.001-08:00

Finally the end of chaos...

Few of the most horrific days are over. A lot happened in last 3 days. So many questions buzzing in the head with no answers....and nobody to answer.

That's the problem with the state of affairs here. As a society we are not answerable. We pick up something and drop it in between, no questions asked... forget it. Pick up something else to drop it again. We are so used to failures, we don't feel bad when we fail and we don't care when others fail. Failure is in our blood stream.

I witnessed some very disturbing things in last few days, nothing new but it disturbs me whenever I realize.

Politicians....

I saw Narendra Modi offering Rs 1 Crore to the families of the police men who died during this operation, including the one whom he was calling all sorts of names just 2-3 days back. Opporunism at it's best. I can't control my smile when while talking to people in front of Taj Hotel, looking grim and very serious, Narendra Modi pushed away a police man gently, because he was obstructing the camera view. That tells everything about this man and politicians in general.

I see politicians like Rajiv Pratap Rudi, Abhishek Manu Singhvi, Kapil Sibbal, Prakash Javarekar etc quite busy in such times. Their dog fights on every channel make you feel as if they are acting. I saw Rajiv Pratap Rudi and Abhishek Manu Sighvi on two channels one by one talking same things and fighting with same vigour on the same issue. Were they not done earlier? Were they part of the programs and acting accordingly? Was that a reality show?.... Shame on these politicians.

I would like to pick Milind Deora. On one of his first talk show appearance he sounded quite meek and didn't have strong opinions, but see him after few shows. Now he is enlightened. Do we need such leaders who need some talk show hosts and participants to tell them what to do? Don't they have their own brain?

Man Mohan Singh. Our prime minister. He should rather be a CEO of a company. When you listen to him talking, it takes some time to really figure out that he is talking tough. It's dipressing to see a prime minister with a body language like his. Another big no is his reading his speeches badly while addressing a nation. He looks more concerned about reading it right than conveying the message. This will not work. If you need the support and trust of entire country then your voice should come from your heart. People should not just hear what you are saying, they should feel it.

Sonia Gandhi....I think her intentions are right, but this is a classic example of when you do not get something by choice. Instead of action you always react to the situation. We need somebody in this country who can think few steps ahead...a manager not the gate keeper who raises an alarm when something goes wrong.

L K Advani....prime minister in waiting....scary. His every word sounds politically motivated. He didn't attend PM's all party meeting because he was capaigning in Rajasthan!!! Can he lead our country...NO

All others... they all look like background dancers in a movie song, imitating the steps of the main dancer.

TV Channels.....

TV reporters after the Taj operations were over taking you through the building looking very excited and reminding you every few minutes about the exclusivity of the visuals.... that you are seeing first on their channel.

Now the season of talk shows... I see an argument between Shobha Dey and Jayanti Natrajan... Shobha dey says something..... Jayanti Natrajan responds very angrily....Shobha replies to it.....Jayanti shouts.... viewers get involved.....reporter keep asking their reactions one by one.....it goes on for some time and now reporter is satisfied. He has got enough footage. He stops both the parties, reminding them that the debate is not on what happened but what needs to be done. Rediculous.....but he has to sell his program. Public likes these kind of fights on their screen. May be this talk show get an award this year.

Aaj Tak... This news channel showed an extremely insensitive piece on Major Unnikrishnan. They made a music video playing songs from movies to suitable to similar situations in a movie. The worst of it is, a heart breaking visual of Major Unnikrishnan's mother talking to his son's dead body, dubbed by the channel by some other lady voice speaking pathetic dialogs...... This is outrageous. This is the mockery of a martyr. The channel must be banned.

Rich people... almost all of them claimed better security for Mumbai because they pay maximum tax!!! Should this be the reason? Going by that logic, a village that doesn't pay any tax should get nothing...they should die...pathetic. It's obvious from where these politicians are coming.

Most of the channels focussed on Taj and Oberoi....what happened to Mumbai CST? around 50 people died there, most of them poor and middle class people. But they deserve it, how dare terrorists attack a five star hotel? This was the attitude of panels in most of the discussions. In fact one of the panalist even commented that generally we associate these blasts with ghatkopar and such places, but how come it happened in up scale Colaba? If I live in ghatkopar, is my life less valuable?

Common man....

The comman man is confused...venting all his frustration and anger on politicians. In few days things will be back to normal. He will forget everything, in order to earn bread and butter for himself and his family. Life will go on, displaying 'true spirit of mumbai'....not sure who coined this phrase. Damn the spirit...he has to survive.... he has to earn everyday... to feed his family.....to stay alive.....till a bomb explodes nearby...till a terrorist's bullet finds his body.

Shaken...and stirred

2008-11-27T06:00:00.000-08:00

I am shaken... Shaken to the core. But I am not scared.... that will shake me more.

The date was 26th Nov, 2008. I was working late with my TV on. Volume low as kids are sleeping in the adjacent room. Some movie was running and I was not paying any attention to it. During one of the code compilation I started flipping the channels to see if something interesting going on. On one of the news channel a reported was shouting something, what is he talking about? I increased the volume a bit. That turned out to be one of the most shocking news I ever heard.

Mumbai is under attack!!

Reports of firing at different places and then news of terrorists capturing CTS station, Hotel Taj, Kama Hospital, Nariman House and Oberoi-Trident. I was awake whole night watching this madness, the competition between TV Channels to show the news first, the inaction of politicians, the ill equipped policemen and terrorists creating havoc on the streets of Mumbai. I was shaken completely. It was all so unreal, like a movie. I especially remember the visuals of terrorists in a police van firing at the reporters. That was a horrific sight.

I am completely shaken.....and stirred!! Am I scared? No... There were all kinds of faces seen on the TV screen, some scared...some crying...some worried....some thinking....some brave...trying to fight it out. I felt numb.... for some time. Which face I would like to pick for me? worried...thinking....brave.....concerned.....angry.... may be a bit of all, till the time when a common man is not scared while walking on the streets.

Let's pray for all the souls to rest in peace.